June 6, 2010

Why Facebook is annoying me.

"Living a life that is molded around what other people think of you is a game of cat-and-mouse that will only lead to stress and inner torment, as no one is capable of living up to everyone’s ideals of who you should be..." -UncleCharles [via 43things.com forum "I Want To Stop Caring What Other People Think of Me"]


Facebook is annoying me for one reason. That reason is because of this idiotic "Tell me what you think about me" or "Tell me what you like about me" game. It's ridiculous and scandalous.

Why do people feel the need to know what other people think of them or how others view them? True confidence and self value comes from knowing what YOU like about YOURSELF, and not caring what people think of you. I've been going through and looking at most of the people who want the most comments. I've noticed a trend, most of them are quiet people who I know for a fact care about what people think of them. It's saddening actually. I wish I could personally tell them this, but I am not a Psychologist (Yet) and I'm sure they would deny the accusations of living life based on what other's think.

This type of game does more harm than good. Some people will take such comments straight to heart. Meaning if it's a good compliment, it's human nature to feel more egotistical. If it's a bad comment, it's definitely hurtful, and it dampens self esteem. Another thing is that some are going to feel as though they need to live up to what people think of them. This causes a whole spectrum of personality issues and difficulty with self actualization.

Some people feel as though these comments are like gold. For each good one they receive, it's another one to put on the shelf. Gaining lots of positive comments, is like putting gold in their pocket, it's a sort of happiness that they don't get often.

I despise this kind of game, because it does so much Psychologically, it's basically a mind game.

Not to mention the liars and fakers. Feeding such great comments about the person via Facebook but in real life, they wouldn't give them the time of the day. How can you accept and enjoy comments from someone, who didn't even speak to you when you sat next to each other in high school? Do their comments hold as much value as your best friend's comment? Psychologically it does. In fact, a stranger's comment holds much more weight than a friend's. Disagree? Think of it this way...

You're in the mall wearing a brand new outfit. Your friend sees you and is amazed at how cute the outfit is. Of course, you feel happy that your friend likes your outfit but then as you're browsing in Macy's, a young lady around your age comes up to you and compliments your outfit. Which one are you truly more fascinated about? Your best friend who sees you everyday, or the stranger, who you've never seen before, that took time out to notice you and come over to actually give you the compliment? Generally, it's the latter.

I'm not not trying to be a party pooper whatsoever, but I am trying to raise awareness about this Psychological game that's being played on Facebook. These are not only mere comments that may or may not be true, for a lot of people it's their lives. What other people think of them is like their food, their medicine, they crave it. Too many teens suffer with self esteem issues, and I'd hate for the wrong comment to end up being a catalyst (Something that speeds up) for someone's down spiral. Choose your words carefully, think critically, and if you don't have anything nice to say to one person, I suggest you erase the entire status and don't give feedback to anyone. If you have to make up something false, don't send a comment to anyone.

BE SAFE RATHER THAN SORRY!!! TOO MANY TEENS ARE DYING AND COMMITTING SUICIDE BECAUSE OF THESE KINDS OF GAMES. AS LONG AS YOU HAVE GOD'S LOVE (ALWAYS) AND ACCEPTANCE, THE COMMENTS FROM ANOTHER BEING SHOULD NOT PHASE YOU. GOD MADE YOU TO HIS STANDARDS OF PERFECTION! LISTEN TO HIM.

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