November 20, 2010

Internet Bullying...




Before reading, view the image above (Click it), read the tweets that I woke up to this morning...And some people STILL believe that Internet bullying is not an issue? If I were conducting a study, this would be the PERFECT evidence. And Part Deux...






Honestly, if I were as light hearted and self-conscious as I was a couple years back, I'd be in tears and hating myself right now. Suicidal? Maybe not, but I used to care ALOT about what other people thought about me. Especially the opposite sex, as most teens (and even adults) do. When I read over all of this, I just kinda laughed, I mean I've heard more hurtful things in the past anyway (refer to older posts if necessary). But this SAME guy who's now calling me a "gorilla" told me just like a month ago how cute I was...AND keeps mentioning me, AND analyzes my picture so much that he notices that I don't have eyebrows now if I were so ugly, how could he stand to look at me so long? Hmm.

Teens and pre-teens face this kinda stuff all the time. Which is why a lot of teens are committing suicide. I remember reading about a girl who was 13 years old, and lived in Australia. She was teased so much at school, her only escape was the Internet...Mostly Myspace. Her bullies got a hold of her Myspace site and created a fake page. The fake page was supposed to be a boy. "He" talked to her, and flirted with her, for an insecure teen, that's MORE than a big deal. After a couple months, the girl found out the guy wasn't real. The bullies took all the messages they sent each other, and distributed them around the school. The next day, the teen was found dead, an apparent suicide.

This case occurred about 4-5 years ago, and you can imagine how much worse it's gotten. Innocent people, targeted for what? A joke? Popularity? Followers? This guy on Twitter, makes his name by talking about people, for no reason. I pray, that no emotionally weak teenager falls into his trap, because it could be tragic.

In New Jersey, Democrats are trying to pass a law to prevent bullying. If I were in New Jersey, I'd support the law wholeheartedly! Bullies need to be held accountable for their actions. Some of them have made people commit suicide, how low is that? Bullying could be almost like murder...It's mentally draining and painful. Not only do I know from experience but I've seen other kids bullied too.

I believe it starts from home, so parents should be held accountable too. Not to mention the media. All in all, bullying needs to STOP! I will advocate the campaign to stop bullying until something is really done about it.

November 14, 2010

Relationships 265

I'm always talking about relationships, I know.
If I were ever in a relationship, It would have to be uncommon, unique, and different from the average relationship. However, I know that's never going to happen unless by the grace of God, I meet someone who's a "relationship virgin" as I am.

Yes, I've never been in a relationship (boyfriend/girlfriend kind of thing) but I've had a few close calls. At first, I thought it was me. I am the scared one, I'm always the reluctant one and yes, that's true. I thought I was scared of getting hurt after seeing friends, family, and even strangers hurt by someone they gave their heart to and yes, that's true. All of those things are true, but what I'm really scared of is how "typical" modern relationships work.

Out of the few close call relationships I've had, I hated it. There was the stupid flirting, cat and mouse kind of stage in one. Which in my opinion is tiring and annoying. Then there was the text and message ALL the time in another. I like communicating but after a while that gets annoying too. Not to mention that I hate texting. Then there's the dating stage, you have to go out, and basically one person is trying to impress the other or both are trying to impress each other.

What do I want? I just want to talk on the phone and in person, get to know each other. No chasing, no flirting, no lies/trying to impress each other, just talk! I want to go out not on a "date" per se, but to have fun, relax and just to be in each other's company. That could be a stroll through a bookstore, frappuccino's at a coffee shop, or just like a drive through the city. Alot of relationships END because you didn't know the person at the BEGINNING. There's too much emphasis on impressing the other, and personally, I don't think that's the best way to go. It's like meeting someone at a club. They're generally in their best shoes, clothes, wearing the best hairstyle, accessories, etc. and people are attracted to one another not because they look as if they have a nice personality, but because they're eye candy. Right there, the relationship is superficial already. i'm not saying that's true for all cases, but it happens...Alot.

Anywho, what I don't want is a typical relationship (Meet. Text. Date. Sex. Talk. Love. In no specific order). I want to know him, his thoughts, his feelings, his style, his ideas, his life, and whatever he wants me to know. I don't want sex... Kissing, touching, and sweet little nothings are of more value. I don't want to be eye candy, something he can show off to his friends. I want to be able to wear jeans and a t-shirt around him. I just want to be ME around him from the beginning and I want him to be him around me from the start.

But with all the sex, temptation, and girls overly willing to seduce a man... Conversating, having alot of things in common, and being mentally/emotionally close isn't enough to hold together a relationship for the guys of today.

Sad.

November 1, 2010

From the Inside

I'm single, I'm lonely.
It's late at night.
I wish someone would hold me.
I've been single my whole life, God this can't be right.
February, Valentine's Day.
Lovers hand in hand, I'm so jealous!
Praying to God, if I may,
Find someone to make I an us.
May 24th, I'll never forget,
Your smile, your touch, your laugh.
I never thought I'd hear it.
"Will you be my girl...This isn't a gaffe."
His words assured me,
My heart on the line,
Skipping beats like a CD,
I said "YES!" instantly on a high with no decline.
No longer single, I is an us
I never knew how great this could be, no longer a third wheel.
"I love him" is my Facebook Status.
Is this feeling real?
Our 3 month anniversary,
Attached at the hip.
I call him my baby; he calls me his Beauty.
100 days of unexplainable bliss,
Oh, how time flies when it's love you're in,
Single is a feeling I definitely don't miss.
Saturday night the time is right, my hands all over his skin.
Deeper and deeper we explore,
Under the stars shining bright,
The passion there and I can't ignore,
With one thrust our bodies unite.
Having convulsions,
Quiet whispers turn to loud moans.
My body is his, no love potions.
My mind in a whirlwind, cyclone.
Silence.
"I love you"
Three words of the most expense.
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
"I love you too"
Would have been nice,
But he said he didn't think,
The time was right.
I sat there letting my heart sink,
My mind going "He loves you, he just can't say it"
This isn't the worst, at least I'm not single.
His phone goes off, he has a new text,
It's work, his boss is so evil.
He's needed at work, the new kid can't flip the burgers.
My man to the rescue.
He kisses me goodnight, running like a 40 yard dasher.
6 months together, just me and my boo.
Life is hard, but love is easy.
His love confession hasn't been reciprocated,
But I'm still his beauty, him my baby.
He works alot, but everynight,
We have our illicit eruption.
When I come up with something stupid we fuss, fight.
I learn how to keep my mouth shut,
I hate to anger him.
He doesn't want our relationship public, it's on the hush hush.
I'm special to him,
He hates to share.
Sometimes he'll call me on a whim,
To tell me how much he cares.
Although we don't talk very much,
This isn't the worst, at least I'm not single.
I wear my hair in a bunch,
My clothes are always wrinkled.
He likes me slim, so I never eat lunch.
He tells me the only person I need to look good for,
Is him, and to him, I look good in rags,
No need for Baby Phat, Dereon, or even a visit to the hair parlor,
I have a man, who I can keep for brags.
He's cheated on me once or twice,
But he still loves me, he told me so.
At least he comes home to me at night.
He says I have not a friend, everyone is a foe,
Not even family, they don't understand us.
I have nothing, no friends, family, I'm at an all time low.


This isn't the worst, at least I'm not single.