September 8, 2015

Random Thoughts of Today

ate a cake doughnut today, and it was awesome. The man who served me looked odd in his juvenile baseball cap and receding hairline. l prayed today, talked to God and it was even better than the doughnut. I realized how much she lights up when other people are around. Today I felt jealous. I want to be the only source of light. My hair came out nice today, I tried to take a selfie to celebrate my feeling of beauty, but every picture I took turned out ugly. Who's distorting my image? I wore bright yellow today, my brother called me a highlighter.  I can't stop thinking about my heart and what I'm feeling. I feel you pulling me with you but is it real or not? I don't think the feelings are mutual, but it's easy to hide them. The hard part is feeling them.

Neil Simon said I'm just like him, well in so many words. We both observe, listen, and make up stories in our heads about people we don't know. We're pretty similar. He's a legendary screenwriter. I felt inspired.  

These guys, they offer me nothing. We discuss nothing of importance, why are discussing anything at all? I need sustainability and substance. I want to feel you...I want to FEEL you. I want us to feel and fill each other. Challenge me, make me laugh, make me think. I felt hopeless today. Love is not even on my radar... No interest in me, I suppose. I drove aimlessly around town for two hours, I felt free. It hurts to spend time with you because eventually I know we will say goodbye sooner or later. Temporarily or permanently. I keep dreaming about kissing someone. God said to be prepared because it will happen in my waking life. I'm intrigued. I told Google to define soulmate, apparently I haven't met him yet. I wonder if the kisser is my soulmate? I had a cheeseburger for dinner, it was captivating, unlike those guys it filled me. 

I was all over the place today, but overall it was a good day.  I had to tell someone. 

1 comment:

  1. thanks for sharing your story :)

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